This is really proven and there is no doubt they would work! You only need these 3 steps, and you are on your way to corporate stardom!
Firstly, keep quiet and remain within your cubicle. Don't mix around nor talk to your colleagues. Only talk to managers and joke with them, oh, you don't have to respect the managers, too. Act as if if they don't have you, the team will fail. Also, delegate all the work out, do as little as possible, but delegate as much as possible! Remain like this for about as long as you could and you would definitely be promoted as more and more people leave the team due to your fuck up attitude.
Secondly, whenever the team is on huge projects or tight schedule, tender your resignation. Then, you would get your counter-offer-interview. State a salary others are paying you, even if you do not have an offer yet, boast a huge salary hike. This way, the stupid managers would think that you are an invaluable asset and would try their very best to keep you! STUPID!
Thirdly, keep your eyes and ears opened to look out for other companies in huge projects or tight schedule. Apply for it and ask for high post and high high salary. Die die also the stupid managers would get you in! Why? Because they need people to be in the team, at least if the projects fail, the stupid managers would say they have done their best to keep the projects going. Oh, they have one extra person to blame, too. So, if you ask high high salary, they would take you also.
If you are born to survive and prosper in this corporate shite, intermix the 3 steps above, my god, marnie(money) will keep pouring in! Like how? Join a company with huge projects/tight schedule, ask high high salary. When you are in, keep quiet and start delegating work, piss as much ppl as possible and make it real bad to the work environment. Make as much ppl leave as possible, make it real hard for the new joinees, make the hell out of them! Now you have 2 choices, either stay there for as long as possible and wait for your luck. Or look for another company with huge projects/tight schedule, tender your resignation and hope for a huge increase! If they can't pay, you got nothing to loose, join another company with huge projects/tight schedule, boast about your previous huge projects and get in.
Wah! How can you be not rich?! Oh, if you prefer the first method, make sure you bail yourself out when the projects are destined to fail. At least, you won't be the fella who got blamed, let the stupid managers get all the shite!
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